In the midst of BLUDGING

Updates of a new phrase of life

2007-09-20T01:50:00.000+10:00

Yeah I know that I have not been updating my blog for sometime and I was actually amazed that I managed to log in to my blog after 2 attempts at the username and password. Just as I thought my memory is going to fail me, I was logged in. Anyway, a typical day in SG surrounds the morning crowd, the crowded trains, the pretty good life at work (for the moment), friends and family.

Life in SG since returning back for good does not seem to deviate much from the frequent holiday trips back to SG from sydney. Guess I was mentally prepared for this when I returned back to Sydney for graduation. Leaving Sydney in Aug was much easier and less emotional than the one in July. I can't pin point to a single reason for this and will be happy to attribute that I have become immune to this.

However, when orientation started, I realise I do still dislike changes. The once effortless mingle and small talks have changed to something that I have to endure. Socialising did not seem to be fun anymore. As people advance with age, we become more resistant to changes and new people. Luckily I met some new nice people who seem to be on the same frequency and I did had fun during orientation.

Hopefully, more people that are nice will be met during my time at work. Things have been good in SG, with my family being extremely accommodating. Many things have changed including many relationships, and ironically, despite knowing this, I have chose to ignore till now.

Happier memories:

Graduation Photos

in John Clancy

My "day light saving" party group/ stir shit group/the group that makes my last 2 semesters in Sydney most memorable :P

Photos are taking too long to upload, so these are just a few of them taken during graduation day

Lastly, Me & Ting @ Sushi tei in Sydney after so much trouble finding it!!!! (I told the manager of the branch in Sydney that I loved sushi tei)

A guess?

2007-06-24T01:39:00.000+10:00

I managed to catch Ocean's Thirteen today. While on the bus journey back, with music blasting into my ears from my Ipod Mini, I suddenly recalled a question my dad asked me some time back. This is what he asks: "why do you never speak up when you are angry or unhappy with something?" I could not answered his question at that time. Tonight, it dawn upon me that maybe I have always knew that by speaking up, I might get too emotional. Hence instead of allowing emotions to take control, suppressing them by not saying will be a much better option. However, this might just be an attempt trying to get to the answer to the above question. Maybe there are other reasons which I have yet stumbled upon.

A letter to Mum

2007-06-21T13:48:00.000+10:00

Dear Mum,

An argument I have had with my mum yesterday left me bothered and uneasy the whole day. Although it has always been easy to end an argument with "whatever", how many of us can actually ignored the feelings of your dearest ones and to continue to do what you think is right?

It has never occurred to me that "up to you" has a totally different meaning when it comes to parents. The realisation hit upon me yesterday when an issue I thought I have long resolved came back into the picture again. How many times have we said "up to you" and actually mean it? Apparently, for my parents, they don't take "up to you" as the literal meaning I have taken. Maybe I have known this long ago but just that I chose to ignore it so that I can be at ease with myself to do the things I wanted to do. Maybe I am just too dense to see it. Or maybe I am just bad at communicating my ideas verbally.

I don't know what went wrong in this issue just that I wanted to clear things up a bit in this entry. If our arguments have never ended with "up to you", I will have tried harder to resolve the issue and a compromise can be made. It's not that never listen, I do listen, but sometimes I hope you listen to me as well. I did consider coming back earlier, if not I will not have been in such a dilemma as I am now. If i have dis-regarded your feelings, feelings of uneasiness will never have swept across me and make me lose sleep over this.

I have always been envious of friends able to have long talks with their mum. It's always you have no time for me or I have no time for you. Guess that's how society has make us to be. We have become so narrow-minded in our thinking and lives, that we centered everything around ourselves. I am guilty of that too. Hopefully, with this entry, you seek to understand me better and that I do care about what you think. Maybe next time, instead of being too emotional and ending off conversations with "up to you", I will be able to get a clearer idea of your underlying meaning.

Simply put, my wish has always been for you to be happy and proud of me.

Cheers
Jasmine

Procrastinating

2007-06-17T00:43:00.000+10:00

With 2 days to my last paper of my master degree in Aus, instead of studying diligently, I am cracking my brain to try to blog. I know it has been some time since my last entry. Time flies so fast that I did not realise that as each day passes, it brings me closer to the end of my student life and also my life here in Sydney. It seems weird as I remembered the day in year 2005 as I walked past the customs of Changi Airport, waving good-byes to my family and friends. During that time, I was still pondering over my decision to change my path and lifestyle that seems all so good in the sunny island. Coldness swept over me when I first arrived in Sydney, it swept pass me again when I send my mum off in a cab to the airport to return back to the sunny island.

And with only a few weeks left, I am ready to leave this place I called home for the past 2 years. I am amazed at the speed I adapt to the change in surroundings, weather, lifestyle, etc. I know going back to Singapore will mean another round of changes that I have to face. As much as I hate changes, I knew I will overcome them and adapt to it once again.

For now, I just want to enjoy the last few weeks of my aussie life here. So studying, bludging, driving to random places, drinking, mackers, cooking and trying to poison my friends, facebooking, touring around and hopefully skiing before going back to eating char keow teow and carrot cake!!!

Joanna's surprised birthday party

Me & Theresa I think I can be the spokesperson for alcohol!

COMPEC BALL 2007

It was raining and the wind was going rooooooooooooooooooooo the whole night! A very cold night which makes going out of the house difficult. Cruise has to turn back to the harbour due to bad weather which is a good thing as I was starting to get sea sick half way through my main!

More photos are facebook

A day at Watsons Bay

Haha a fine of $150 for committing sucide at Watson's bay

Haha A private date at Watson's Bay for me and Ting. Thanks Ting for driving to all the random and yet beautiful places around Sydney. If not for you and your beloved Honda CRV, I will not have visited all these places. Thanks for being there for me throughout this semester, taking all the insults from me and put up with all the nonsense I did and yeah most importantly being my pet. I never knew why I always felt so comfortable and at ease around you. Thanks dear for being my friend.

Seems like I am back in the old school days when taking neo prints is the most fashionable thing to do

One Happy Day

2007-06-05T01:39:00.000+10:00

This is going to be the last week of my student life. Surprisingly, this time the feeling differs vastly from that in year 2005 when I completed my degree from NTU. Guess I knew its the last time I am going on a last mintue dash for my assignments, the last time I can skip lectures when I feel like it, the last time of feeling the freedom as an unburdened student. I am glad for all that happened during the past 1 year and 10 months. Appreciated all the friends that bring me warmth in this practically foreign place. All the second thoughts and complaints about being in Sydney vanished as I went for my second last class of the week. I am really happy to be here and I guess no amount of money (earned by my other friends) can buy that over.

Really Happy Wiseman Trip photos

Cheers

Jas

Maybe

2007-05-10T13:25:00.000+10:00

Maybe I could not help in one way or another, but the least I could do is to listen.

Something I just read

2007-05-07T00:27:00.000+10:00

"If you had the chance, just one chance, to go back and fix what you did wrong in life, would you take it?"

Something to ponder about after reading "One more day"

Cheers
Jas

Eventful weekend

2007-05-06T23:35:00.000+10:00

The past weekend has been an eventful one, with the SSA party happening with a huge bang on Fri night. This semester, we have seen 2 successful, recognised parties that our socials have put the effort in making these happen. Sometimes, I felt much more comfortable being in the SSA Committee as compared to being in COMPEC. One reason maybe due to the differences in power and responsibility and with greater responsibility brings about greater stress. Another reason I think its the lack of respect from certain people in COMPEC. Respect doesnt seem to be present in the committee and committee members arent that bonded and committed as compared to people in the SSA committee. COMPEC is run on a system similar to the one in Singapore and ironically, SSA doesn't although, everyone in the committee, is from Singapore. Its sad when people refuse to let go of power and yet unwilling to take responsbility that comes along with the power. I understand there is a limit on the amount of transparency on everything, but at least have the decency to allow the one taking the responsibility to be in the loop.

Anyway, back to the topic of SSA @ Equilibrium, the party was great, with good company, good music, good venue, etc. Many people turned up including those friends I hold dear to my heart. Lots of drinks, lots of photos, lots of dancing and lots of care and concern for those drunk. Thanks Ting, Kunrui, KL, Ian for taking care of me and Ting for putting up with my verbal abuse. Heehee

Finished watching Spiderman 3 today. I think it was pretty good, except for some parts, where the pace got too slow to my liking. Was pretty touched at the part where Spiddy's best friend died for him. Too idealistic though. Enough of Sipderman 3. In case Kengloon decides to be a fan of my blog and accidentally read the plot. :P

Cheers

Jas

Activities in Easter Break

2007-04-16T15:54:00.000+10:00

Easter Break flew past me travelling at a speed greater than light (as least to me). Have spend the days going on trips to South Coast, Hunter Valley and my little own train taking adventure to Strafield, doing my Hilton's franchising case study. Guess let the photos do the talking.

Fri: "Quiet" day + Night at Shang Ri La

View of Sydney from Shang Ri La

Satisfied dinner with nice wine

Sat: South Coast Trip

On the way towards South Coast

Yeah we are here!!!Double Rainbow

Wed: Strafield/George's Place

Need to run for group meeting. More photos on next update.

Cheers

Jas

Respect

2007-04-08T18:57:00.000+10:00

I met someone whom I respected and believed that he earned that same respect from everyone else in Singapore, not to mention, the world.

Jackie's Birthday Dinner

2007-04-01T02:18:00.000+10:00

Today was the day where I could just slack at home and watch HK serials. After a nice lunch with Betty today, my whole day was spent watching the exciting HK episodes and returning to my anti-social lifestyle I have led last year. The serials were so enticing that I nearly refused to attend Jackie's birthday dinner. ( I cant do that for 2 reasons: 1) her present was with me 2) I will get killed by Jackie and Imelda.) The place we went to for dinner was nice and food was pretty good as well. Some photos of the night + Yum cha photos:

Me, Jackie, Imelda

Happy Birthday Jackie!!!

I love wine

My Dinner which was good!!!

Jackie and the present me, Shellen & Brian Bought

Following Shellen's pose :)

Have taken alot more photos than these, but it costs too much to post the photos up. That the bad point about uni network. How I miss the NTU network. Haiz

Cheers

Jas

Athena's Graduation

2007-04-01T01:43:00.000+10:00

Congrats once again to Athena for graduating. Have been taking photos with my graduating friends these days. Having seen these graduands walking around the uni these days reminds me of my NTU days. Time flies at such a rapid speed that we often don't notice the each day that flew past. Remembering the days where I felt the urge to graduate when I see graduands in their growns taking photographs in NTU. Surprisingly, no such feelings were present these days. Either the number of times you graduate doesnt makes a difference now with a degree in hand, or it may just be that I have grown up of this. Anyway, some photos that were due long ago to update people on my Oz Life....

Recycled Arguments

2007-03-24T02:56:00.000+11:00

It has been a long time since I updated my blog. There are several reasons for this, firstly, COMPEC but I am not complaining about the increased in workload due to the increased in authority. A point to add is that I am really lucky to have some executives (2T + 4M + 4Edu) who are really committed in getting the work done. I think one of them is so committed that I think I am going to ban her from doing Compec stuff soon. :p Secondly, socialising with friends that I have left behind in Sydney for around 3 months. Time flies so quickly that friends were surprised to have me back. Although lots miss me like crazy whaha. Lastly, the lack of discipline and procrastination leads to a lack of updates on my long forgotten blog. Lack of self discipline has always been my weakness that I never failed to notice but no efforts to change it were ever made.

Anyway, these 4 weeks in Ozland, did not turn out as expected. The worries on the lack of matters and events to do, the lack of courses or studying materials to study did not materialised. Higher authority comes in hand with greater responsibility. However, not everyone seems to acknowledge this statement. There are people who can wants the power and authority and yet not accepting the responsibility that comes with it. There are people who wants the name, the recognition but not putting any effort in it. The recognition maybe there on paper, there by name, but I wonder if they ever stop to think about recognition by people. What's the point of having the recognition on your resume or a certificate, where you yourself reaslise or people around you realise that you have done nothing to deserve that "recognition"?

I wonder if these people out there are the smarter ones, whereas me standing by principles are the ones losing out. This is a question to ponder about but maybe I will still be standing by my beliefs as time passes.

Anyway, today is Athena's graduation. Congrats Honey and I am sorry for missing your graduation ceremony but I watched it on TV. Heehee Something worth mentioning about: Honey's dad thinks that my Cantonese is not bad wor. Whaha

Cheers
Jas

Photos from DIm Sum Buffet

2007-02-02T16:26:00.000+11:00

Went to Dim Sum Buffet at East Coast with my Secondary School friends. Conversations ranged from what happen in Secondary school to JC gossips to work place politics and complaints. Have an enjoyable day that day, with good food, comfortable company and free transport. (heehee all thanks to Sharon)

Photos are all taken without food as we were too hungry to be bothered to take any photos. Photos shown are just different combinations of the 7 of us after a fulfilling and satisfying lunch.

Thats for all folks.

Cheers

Jas

Home sweet home

2007-02-01T01:16:00.000+11:00

More than 2 months have passed since my return back here and finally today, I have again managed to experience the normal working life of being mopped by the after work crowd. Hence, this explains my presence and time to update my long abandoned blog. Since my return, several changes happen to the Spore landscape. Firstly, the new hippy area to hang around in - Vivo city. However, I find that place over-hyped and there is nothing special about it except for the fact that being there, you are closer to Sentosa. The second new hippy place to be seen in was St James Powerhouse, which I must admit was pretty cool, with the different themes in each of its different clubs. The idea of combining a KTV style lounge and a canto/mandarin pop concert after a night of clubbing was something different as compared to the usual clubs been to, either in spore or sydney. New places to hang around in are always welcomed, but I do reckon, after all the hype, people will still want to be seen around in our usual, most popular location - Orchard Road.

Other than changes in the Spore landscapes, I have realised that Spore is getting more and more populated. Experiencing the morning crowd madness or the Xmas or New Year celebrations to see it for yourself. I was pretty amazed to how I am being sweep by the crowd everyday on my way to work. Sometimes I need to run in another direction just to avoid being crash into by fast moving people (speed > x4) :P. Trains and buses will be packed full with people, sometimes with inconsiderate people who will either rush onto the buses (trains) before allowing passengers to get off (out) or passengers thinking that they were pole dancers trying to stick their bodies to the poles in the trains. This just set me thinking on the usefulness of our laughable "courtesy" campaigns.

Putting complains aside, this trip back home has been enjoyable overall. Although, in the initial stages, I was not adapting to the buzz around the house, the faster pace, the working life, everything turns out to be well as time passes. Once again, humans adaptability never fails to amaze. However, certain glitches do happen along the way and these glitches set me thinking. I realised that most conflicts/breakdowns stem from mis-communication or basic prejudice. With individuals normally letting emotions crowd over reasons, arguments and conflicts are simply not uncommon. My individual thought was to get a reasonable and fair result, something that belongs to me. However, sometimes, things cannot be under control, even though, its someone you thought will be responsible enough to be trusted. I have decided that I will just let things flow and see the outcome. If my counter party decides to be unreasonable (it wont comes as a surprise due to his lack of maturity), I will just let him/her be. Just a reminder though, this doesn't signifies a winning outcome for my counter party, but instead it symbolises that a lack of human touch due to the missing ability to reason as a person and future judgement of him by people around.

Unpleasant things aside, greatest even revolving my life now is my internship. Whaha This sounds so unhappening. Will update more about my internship stint later, although it wont be as exciting as what was shown in Simple Life 3 (haha yeah i watched that bimbotic series).

This return back also make me realise the importance of my family. Although, my mum never stopped nagging about how I treated this like a hotel, its this that makes up the buzz in the house. Whaha I cant let my mum read this, or she will never stop nagging. In addition, catching up with my friends have been occupying my life these days too. I am thankful for the effort my friends have put in to maintain our friendships. Their accommodating behaviour to my ever changing schedules, their effort put in to organise a gathering, effort put in to make it a point to have lunch/ dinner at the very last minute and the sudden cancellations of appointments due to work issues. Thus guess these friendships are here to stay even as everyone get busy with work or with increased hatred for auditors. Whaha Need to sleep. Update again.

Cheers
Jas

Updates

2007-01-22T04:09:00.000+11:00

Yeap I do know that it has been a long time since I posted something. The main reason was not because I was really busy but because I forgot my password and username to this account. Guess this does not come as a surprise to those who know me well.

Yeah current updates are basically about my audit life. My seniors and colleagues were great. Although one of my senior was being ostracized by me due to him not not showering for a week. Can u believe that in HOT, Humid Singapore, he actually did not shower. I told him straight that he smells and I move to another office whaha. Guess not many interns have the courage to do that. Heehee. Hence work is not too bad anymore due to entertainment created by me although the long hours of work still stays the same. Yeah gladly added, Ling has now become the new hot favourite in my audit team as she is now the wallpaper girl and becoming the motivation for work for my male colleagues whaha.

Went clubbing for 2 consecutive weeks and realise that I am getting old as my body seems unable in undertaking these sleep depriving activities. St James was pretty fun although the crowd was a bit more beng. Yesterday was the SSA party which created quite a huge saga as we have to change a new location in less than 24 hours before the party begins. Pictures were thanks to Porshee, our new SSA photograp her.

GG to sleep for now. Cheers and out!

Life as an intern

2006-12-25T05:22:00.000+11:00

It has been around 3 years since I was an intern. Internship is always associated with doing all the "shit" work for a minimal amount of pay. And yeah thats exactly how I am feeling right now. For the past two weeks, the only thing I have been looking forward to is FRIDAY as it just means sleeping in the next day. I have been so drained from work everyday that, I would just want to go home instead of meeting up with friends. This is in total contrast with the period when I was doing tax where works end at 5.30 and I will be chased to go home. Nowadays, work ends on average at 7 when the time stated was 5.30. Seriously not used to the hectic lifestyle, the fast paced and the over crowding symptom u are faced with in SG every moment everyday.

But life in SG is still pretty good with gatherings with sec, JC and uni friends. These gatherings are always fun filled and satisfying. Guess being friends for so long, although not meeting as regularly as some others, the friendship have been strong and memories always stayed.

Anyway merry Xmas to all my friends in SG and SYD. I miss u guys in SYD. Stop partying without me though! :p All my friends in SG are too busy to club so sad ;( whaha

Cheers

Jas

End of Blugger life as least for the next 2 months

2006-12-11T02:19:00.000+11:00

Starting my internship tomorrow which simply means no more staying up to 3 am and waking up at 1 pm the next day. The weekend was spent with my family as Sat was my uncle wedding, photos are with the professional photographer. Totally forgot about bringing a camera due to having to wake up too early to go for the tea ceremony. Sneaked out for a mid night show later which caused alot of feedback frommy parents. I was surprised at the feedback maybe due to the fact I have not been hearing it for sometime. Anyway now I have been too full to sleep as a result of a buffet dinner. Dad and mum din eat much as they being traditional chinese din like international buffet as the rest of us. Anyway Happy Birthday Mum! Your present shall be a contract between me and you with terms stating that I shall be more thrifty in the next year!!! Heehee.

Some photos taken when bored...

Me & My sis
(do we look alike?)
(Oh do have a gd look at my sis, Joanna she is coming to HK soon!)

One of the many cakes i have at Goodwood Park Buffet
(dont be jealous Honey!!!)

Happy Birthday Mum!!!

Bludging In Spore

2006-12-03T03:27:00.000+11:00

I have been in Singapore for 6 days and have done nothing constructive except for eating, visiting and meeting family, friends and people. However, most friends are ignoring me in the day as they are busy working or they are too busy with year end. I am not complaining at the lack of things to do as compared to knowing my xiao mei Ting who has been studying really hard for her CFA. (I really hope that she can pass her CFA exam tomorrow and hereby command all my luck to be lent to her which has to be returned after her exam) Haha but Ting did mentioned about being afraid of my luck losing their way on their excursion to sydney. Back to the topic of bludging, I hereby teach people how to self entertain if they are feeling bored in their Singapore trip.

1) Watch Hk serials till late at night (around 4 am) and then wake up really late the next day missing all lunch appointments and getting killed by most friends

2) Lunch appointment with "the rest" to eat ba chou mee & Hainanese Chicken rice (I want my photos from Kunnie)

3) Sing Ktv (twice a wk both in sydney and spore) Guess my parents should send me to learn singing instead of studying accounting whaha

4) Dinner & deserts & drinks with friends (I want photos from amber)

P.S Amber I want ma la hotpot, we must go earlier next time to queue whaha

5) Calling people in Sydney and disturbing them from studying (Sorry Ting but I guess I did provide some entertainment for u too heehee)

6) Visiting my Twin cousins (they are soooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute and that till now was the happiest and most constructive event ever)

HeeheeNicky after finishing her milk and having the energy to play!!!

Nicky deciding she has enough of me & continue her sleeping mission!

This is the other twin, Nicole. Haha but they do look alike. I hope I din mixed them up yet!

Thats it for now. Waiting desperately for the CPA allowance to sponsor my shopping trips. Bludging will have to stop soon as internship starts and thats when I will complain about having too much to do. But complaining is just a humane phrase that everyone goes through. Haha and sad to admit I love complaining about everything in life. Not that I am having a miserable life, just for the joy of it and it does help remind myself how blessed I am with the family and friends that I have.

Enough of entry writing, Time to bludge.

Cheers

Jas

Compec Ball S2 2006 Photos

2006-11-28T12:43:00.000+11:00

Miami Vice

Photos of Compec Ball which is filled with panic moments, hard work, satisfaction and emotions. The party after the ball showcased more interesting stories but pictures of that are mostly deleted away by "not really" that drunk person. All in all, the whole process of managing the ball was a good experience for me and that will pulled and make a friendship so much stronger. Thank you Ting for trusting me and i really appreciated that trust.

The Dance Ball decorations (idea from Ting, work mostly done by Ting and her decoration Team)

The Very Nice Centre Piece (went through so much to get the candles, fish bowl and fake flowers - all within budget)

My Starter which I have 2 mouthfuls and was gone when I got back to the table

Ting and Henry starting the show (I am somewhere controlling the lights)

Me & Jane

Me & John who already has alot of drinks

My main course which I again din eat much

Xiao mei, me, Honey & Caroline

The girls at my table with Shahid

Sofia,me& Honey

I love my desert

I love Honey (wont be able to get rid of me so easily lah Jealousy is not good for health :p)

Karen is soooooooo cute!!!

Me & Xiao mei after the ball

Corporations Law Paper

2006-11-16T16:56:00.000+11:00

Here I am typing at 4.50 pm after a severe lack of sleep of 18 hours, a bottle of red bull, a finished corporations law paper, and a lunch of salted fish and chicken fried rice. It seems weird and ironic that a refusal of "going to bed" signal has been sent up to my little brain. I have not stayed up a whole night to study for one paper for such a long time that I have seem to forgot the feeling of extreme tiredness. I have absolutely no intention of staying up the whole night to study for a paper that I have started preparing ahead of everyone else. Whether this has been the attribution to stress or the strong effects of red bull(I need some answers from the phsy ppl), I experienced a sleepless night.

Tossing around the bed, intervals of reading corporations law notes on directors' fiduciary duties which did not turn up in the exam, and on and off company from Ting's smses. I felt seriously desperate to fall asleep as I know I will not be able to focus the next day during exam and true enough I felt so tired after doing 2 questions that I felt like giving up. However, I was lucky enough to have special individual examination arrangements, a walk around the corridor seems to have clear my mind and steered the least amount of strength and concentration left to complete the paper. It may not be one with perfect grades but it will be a memorable one as I have never in my whole life stayed up awake just for a paper before.

Maybe its just excuses to forgive myself again on the poor grades but being easy on one self makes life easier for me and others around me. I am one of those lazy people who can afford not to finish studying but never afford to miss sleep. Excuses for forgiving myself that allows for failure, for wrong doings, lies, lack of responsibilities,etc. Tired from that forgiveness of one self, the lack of drive and constant reprimand of myself. Thus I guess its time to sleep.

Cheers

Jas - enjoyed typing crap

Stuvac

2006-11-13T02:15:00.000+11:00

Last week was the beginning of Stuvac and surprisingly I did manage to have a good start in studying. However, the progress of studying seems to slow down and almost come to a halt as days passed. Distractions came and passed, time flies, things happened, but my progress of studying seems stagnant. Surprisingly, no matter how hard I seem to physch myself this term, my drive to excellent grades seems to die off. Have I become lazier or the drive to compete which I felt so close and pressurizing is not present in this different environment? Thinking of the days where intense competitive feelings rising amid friendships, the mixture of feelings of disappointment, jealously, feelings of guarding grades preciously, were long gone. I do miss the drive but surprisingly I feel more at peace with myself here. No more longing to do better than my closest friends, no more disappointment when I see my friends' grades. Guess either the environment has make me lazier or its just my inate lazy charcter at work. With exams coming up in just one day, I need to focus and no more Arrested Development.

Cheers

Jas

The Truth

2006-11-05T22:23:00.000+11:00

Firstly, a slight diversion from today's topic, the Compec Ball has finally come to an end. Not exactly the end, as now the biggest headache is checking up how much money there is still left in the bank to pay the hotel. And I have to ensure all the inflows and outflows do tally. However, this is not going to take as much effort as compared to all things done for the preparation of the ball. From setting the price to selling tickets to buying the stuff for decorations to everything else on that day, I can say I am damn freaking tired. On top of that, everything seems to be happening around me during this period of time and they certainly has affected my mood, thinking and emotions.

But back to the topic. Sometimes I do wonder why must we tell the truth to another person when we obviously know its going to hurt that person tons. I never want to hurt any one especially a friend. However, as friend, its only right if you are truthful or there will not be a basis for this friendship to be based upon on. Relationships are often based on trust and lying even for a good reason may be turning point to wrecking the foundation of a relationship. Hence I do know and understand all these so called theories but if being truthful involves seeing a friend's world crumpling down, it so going to be such a difficult scene for me.

I always believe that what you don't know does not hurts but a friend does say that telling someone the truth now and letting him/her suffer right now is going to save him or her from suffering in the future. Guess I am just fast-fowarding the pain. I think I know what I should do as a friend now since everyone should be entitled to the truth.

Anyway photos of the ball will be up as soon I manage to get all the photos from everyone else.

Cheers

Jas

Pics time

2006-10-31T17:24:00.000+11:00

As promised, Cindy's Sydney trip 2006

Hunter Valley

Me & Carrie (+ Fly) outside Tempest Two Fish Market

Martin Place where Julian nearly knocked down a tree and Jeslynn while trying parallel parking
The Car I crashed

Analysing the actions of a loser

2006-10-30T02:19:00.000+11:00

I have never considered myself a loser but I may be considered one in others' eyes. For example, the incident of "Professional Accounting" has downgraded my level to that of a PRC. Ignoring that slight diversion of topic, I will like to begin this topic by a definition of a loser. Loser=One that is bad in quality. However, I shall be objective today instead of going all personal.

Everyone has first impressions of everyone and my first impressions of people are always wrong (my really good friends' first impression often fall under the category of "no more than a hi bye friend") and thus I do not like to judge a person based on first impressions on a single action he or she has done. Instead I always look beyond their actions and try to see his or her character that drive certain actions. Some people just rank themselves above anyone else and thus this drive their competive actions whereas for some, insecurity just drives them into a category of "try hards".

Although I cannot say that I have a vast experience people as compared to my parents or any others, I guess have a fair share of meeting different types of people who have vast principles and perceptions from me. Thus from my own observations, I feel that insecurity is a key factor of some people which we labelled as losers. I admit that I have been insecure before, lots of my friends have been as well. And thats where true friends come into the picture, where support has been offered to help get over that phrase and we ourselves worked hard to get over it mentally. However for some people, it seems that their insecure phrase never ends, with reasons either being the lack of true friends or simply, he or she refuse to accept that fact.

For example, losers on the superficial level can come across as helpful and knowledgable. With time, it turned into some manipulation techniques (to me) to boost his confidence. Words mean nothing without actions and actions without putting the effort does not mean anything as well. To me I help a friend because I wanted to, not because I want people to think I am a good person and because he or she who needs help is a friend. Friends to me mean alot and wherever, whenever its within my limit to help, I will help without needing anything else. However, insecure people have a different perception from mine(guess most people are different). They are like people who will say yes and then change his mind and act as if he is the busiest person in the world or its other people's fault if he has failed in your expectation in regards to that "voluntary help". Seriously everyone makes mistakes, although the easiest thing to do is to push the blame on another person, it does not help rectify any problems. It just says alot about your character.

Stating a personal experience with an insecure person, there has been once where I have been so sick, that I cannot stop vomitting (I was not drunk, I was SICK), but no one volunteered to accompany me to see a doctor. Seriously since the doctor is just a street across my place, its not a big deal but having someone acutally volunteering will be nice especially all of them were having nothing to do and watching dvds in the living room. Anyway, no one bothered about my condition until a Hongkie friend of mine (huge reasons why I loved Hongkies), called and asked if i wanted to sing ktv. Upon hearing that I was sick, they changed their plans about their beloved ktv plans and came over to my place to bring me some porridge. I did not know about their plans until they came. That was an event that touched my heart so much that I will never forget. Anyway, after that, the loser actually then asked in front of my friends do I want to eat porridge because he can cook for me if i want to. Please why would I want you to cook porridge when my friends brought porridge for me already??? Anyway because my friends are nice and the loser decided he has to be a nicer person, he volunteered to cook for my meals when I was sick although I told him my friends going to send porridge over. That incident changed my whole opinion of him. I always thought although he is a loser, he has redeeming factors. But I guess his redeeming factors are again techniques to manipulate peoples' impressions. Guess all these attributes to his sense of insecurity. Its like how people are born attention seekers and they carry it off but for him, his insecurity which caused his action seeking behaviour to put people off. His behaviour has been so predictable that I can predict with 99% accuracy what he is saying or going to do each day.(Hmm maybe I am a LOSER too) Hence I have managed to get out of the vicious cycle of his manipulations. I know I have been mean to him and probably he does not deserve this. Hence I make up my mind that instead of bitching so much I should just be direct (as usual I will offend alot of people) and guess I will do it soon. However, hopefully he can understand that its not personal but maybe a huge difference in perceptions and principles.

Cheers

Jas

Warmed

2006-10-26T10:30:00.000+10:00

I have finally settled the issue of the crash yesterday and the feeling of relief after the settlement is amazing. This accident allows me to realise certain stuff. I guess I have paid a sum of money to learn a lesson that I will never forget which for sure be useful in the future. Firstly, I must remember to get down the other party details if an accident (touch wood) will ever happen again. Secondly, if money can be used to settle the problem, it will never be a huge problem that cannot be solved. Thirdly, my parents love me damn much. Lastly, interactions with people are always hard, but people can never be lonely for too long either. Its a blessing that no one got hurt in this accident and thinking back, I guess I will not be able to overcome the phobia of driving in this short period of time. However, I am grateful to my friends who have help me through this period of time especially Ting, my xiao mei. Although she is younger than me, the way she thinks and handles stuff, she seems so much way above her own age. Guess its because she has been here mostly alone since she was 10 and unlike me who has been sheltered for my past 21 years, she has put me to shame. And its this that reinforces my beliefs that children should not be too sheltered and that I will want my children out of the Singapore education system unless drastic changes has been make. Anyway really appreciate Ting's help and her little actions really touched me. Its werid that a friend you know for less than 6 months will actually go all the way out to help. Ting actually volunteered to lend me money for the payment of damages, she drove to uni on a wed when she has no class and park her car at uni, took a bus to my place to help me drive to the rental company. She still actually send me back home from the city after dinner although I have insisted I could takea bus home as her home is like half an hour drive away from the city and 1 hr drive away from my place. Really appreciated that and that was something which touches my heart. This is something imcomparable to anything material like throwing a surprise party, or giving a birthday present. Anyway no one knows how things or relationships will change after I leave Sydney, but seriously, even if it changes, the memories, the feelings will never change. Its time to just enjoy the present and not worry about the future. Simply because there will be too many things to worry about. Thanks Cindy as well for volunteering to split the cost although I was the one who crashed the car. Thanks Jo and Carrie for volunteering as well even though they were really out of the picture. Thanks for all the concern and help you guys have given me especially, edwin,Ian,Julian.

Car Crash

2006-10-25T00:28:00.000+10:00

Yeah this is the first road accident I got involved in. In the 23 years of my life, I have always been blessed and have never been involved in one. This time the accident happen in Sydney and I was the driver. Things happen so fast that when I was in a daze when it happen. I did not know how did I manage to get out of the car or give the driver my details as well. Neither did I know how I have managed to continue driving towards Hunter Valley which is like maybe 3 hrs drive away. I drove for 3 hours and the only focus was to drive carefully and reach hunter valley safely. Anyway this incident has been revolving in my mind all the days and nights. I am lucky I was not hurt because if the impact was any larger, I would have been hurt. Or if I manage to rent the Gezt I have book in advance and met with this accident, my legs will have been gone. Guess what I have learned from this is to drive carefully next time and that my parents really love me. Anyway, hoepfully,this whole incident can be solved by paying the money and though its a huge amount, I guess if money is able to solve it, its not too huge a problem. I think I need to work harder in Spore and saved up the money to return it to my parents. Pray I will get a job soon in Sydney and then all the money problems can be solved. Photos taken from the days Cindy is here will soon be posted too.

Cheers

Jas

Running Thoughts

2006-10-17T12:31:00.000+10:00

These days I seem to have been stuck in a situation where I was stuck in secondary school days. After that incident in secondary school, I have always tried to keep a low profile and keep out of social politics. However, it seems like no matter how hard I tried, I never manage to get into a position or an image portrayed to others as one who is low profiled. Thus I am always involved in social politics concerning me or not concerning me, regardless of my liking.

Social politics exist around people. A friend of mine says that Sporeans love to engage in politics. I agree partially as Sporeans are a bunch of people who love to bitch about every single thing in life and that includes me. However, being in Compec and hanging around with other nationalities, there have been conflicts too. They though engage in that to a smaller extent than what I see happening among the Sporeans.

Social politics is one thing that I must learn to adapt and played to. Regardless how much I dislike playing that game, these days I strongly realise the need to do it. I used to be able to played it really well though as I am someone who can portray different sides to different people. A friend asked me if I ever want to be a social worker as she is always amazed at how well I am able to interpret others' actions and characters. This is true and I do used to play that as a strength to get what I want from people. I dislike that but it just comes naturally at times. However, after being in Sydney and lesser interactions with Sporeans, I come to realise that my skills in playing the social politics games deteriorate. The frequent hanging out with Sporeans send out an emergency to me to get into gear in preparation for that game. Guess more is to come with the involvement in SSA and if I get the VP position of Compec. Lets all wait and see whats coming then. - that's Reality.

Jolin Tsai concert

2006-10-15T02:27:00.000+10:00

Yeah I know that I have been complaining about the lack of money these days. But the tickets were bought long ago and the main reason of buying them was because i wanted to have a taste of watching an asian concert in an Ang Mo land. Hehee the concert was just ok as it was too short, think Jolin was trying to cheat some aussie $. But aside of the biasness, Jolin is HOT whaha i sounding a bit werid but thats the truth. Her dances were really good but voice is just so so. She can do carwheels, splits and all the stunts. After the concert we wanted to sing Ktv as i realise it is the hongkie culture to do that. And guess people who know me well enough should know that i have been increasingly hongkiefied. Recently a hongkie asked me when i am returning back to Hongkong in Cantonese. Whaha. Anyway I was really tired yesterday, as I woke up at 6.30 as it was too hot and then 7.30 again to wake Athena up and then 15 mins later jump out of bed as I have forgotten to cook rice for the fried rice that i was suppose to cook for edwin bdae party. After class, cook 3 pots of fried rice and then rush out for compec meeting and Jolin's concert. Missed bulk of edwin's party though. Sometimes I guess even though when people are physically close to one another, their hearts are just so far apart. Tired liao....

Cheers

Jas

Thoughts and Canberra Trip

2006-10-11T13:09:00.000+10:00

Some thoughts came into mind the other day when my sister asks me about my sudden decision of having a blog. Guess the main reason is just a recording of my memories of my adventures/ lifestyle as an overseas student. I think myself as being lucky to have such wonderful parents especially my dad when he will try to give everything I want. The recent calculations to repay my debts which consists basically of uni fees and expenses spend in Sydney lead me to a realisation of a repayment of 8 years not considering interests. Imagine my parents have not been a sport to give me the money in pursement of the dream of studying overseas, I guess I never have the chance to learn some much and see, learn all the things I have been through this period. These experiences are worth more than the academic achievement I came for and I guess it shapes me into whom I am today.

But lets just get back to my Canberra Trip. Canberra being the capital of Australia is a really quiet place as compared to Sydney or Singapore. Guess if my choice was to study in ANU, my only focus will be studying as there is nothing much to do in Canberra. Haha luckily my parents dint know about Canberra at that time but neither did I.

Floriade 2006

Hot Day = Ice Cream

Singapore In Canberra

Mooncake Festival

2006-10-11T12:14:00.000+10:00

This is the 2nd time I have spend mooncake festival over in Sydney. Compared to the one last year, where we just share mooncakes around in hostel with friends from all over the world, this year's one can be considered to be more"happening". The mooncake festival hype has been raised sometime before the actual day due to my sudden craving of eating snow skin durian mooncakes. This managed to come true all thanks to dad's friend who brought it over from Singapore. However, there is only one durian mooncake in the whole of 2 boxes and the fact that it is not from Goodwood Park Hotel, I was disappointed. Despite that the durian mooncake was pretty good. Guess it's because it has been a long time since I ever tasted durian. Anyway Fri was packed full with activities starting from the wake up calls to Athena to early breakfast, to company law lecture, to Market City Mooncake shopping (where I bought more durian mooncakes), to teasing Ting's summer filled new hair style, to cooking fried rice, to SSA elections, to dinner and finally the lighting of candles and lanterns.

Pictures Time

Sydney's Chicken Rice

2006-10-09T02:01:00.000+10:00

Some updates of the recent chicken rice dinner at my place. This dinner can only takes place all because of one person - Edwin the chef. This dinner invitation was issued by me to my friends because of the reason of proving to them that Edwin my housemate can cook better chicken rice than the restaurant in sydney which cost us 13 bucks per plate. Anyway photos going to be uploaded wont showcase any chicken rice as it has been eaten into our stomachs but other interesting stuff going on after dinner.

I love my Jay Chou's Poster

Me and Ting at the Intercom

Cheers
Jas - out

The end of Spring break

2006-10-04T17:29:00.000+10:00

This is my 2nd spring break here in Sydney and i am utterly surprised how fast time flies. It has been a year since I went to Mel last spring and I have spend a yr and more in syd already. The speed that time flies makes me rethink about a lot of stuff as usual. How I seem to be wasting my life away while I look at my other friends working in Spore. These days these thoughts have been filling in my head about the alternative paths, the opportunity costs learned as an economic major. I guess I am not a simple person as I always want to be or how I hope to be. Neither am I someone good as I think myself to be or portrayed myself to be. Seems like I am off track about spring break.
Some latest updates about my week:
Mon: Yum Cha was cancelled which was a good thing cos I cant bear to leave my bed as usual in the morning. However, KTV session was carried on as planned. Think thats why KTV is still the Hongkies' fav.
Tue: Group meeting for Assignment
Discussions, lots of work to do, editing, and discussions.
Wed: Group meeting again
And healthy day as well. Went for back care exercise class and a game of super expensive badminton.
Thurs:
Mooncake collection + Mackers for Sam on her first nite here. Something keep weighing on my mind that day too. Guess people who are close enough to me should know wat happen in spore. But as usual hard for me to find someone to tok abt things too personal. Sam being a typical sporean + tourist she decided it was too early to sleep on her first night here as although it was 11+ Sydney time its only 9+ sporean time. So its time to hit the KTVs again.
Fri:
Torturous day = waking up early for yum cha + shopping but no money to buy anything
Also most of the nite spend at pam's place cos she was too lazy to come over for mooncakes.
Sat:
Catching up on sleep + Clubbing at bamboo
Pretty fun just that I am seriously tired
Sun:
Sleep Sleep Sleep and toking to jo on the phone. Dan's bdae as well and thanks to his parents for such a nice dinner at the rocks. Need to get Dan his present soon too.

Thats all for my bludging life in syd.
Cheers
Jas - out